“Let He Who Is Without an Immature Moment Cast the First Penny”

“Dear Jehovah, why are these freshman SOOOOO ratchet?!” Every high school or college senior asks this question at least 50 times before the 1^st quarter ends. The funny part is how those seniors conveniently forget that they were once the subjects of the same inquiry. A few weeks ago I had a conversation with a past student about her year so far. This was her reply: “I’m good. Working hard, trying to have some fun my last year here—BUT THESE FRESHMAN… (*insert list of uncivilized activities here*)…!!!!!!!!!” I laughed in remembrance of her behavior three years prior—and even recently—but kept commentary to myself (and LAWD, did I want to let have!!). I cannot lie; I’ve been on both ends of the matter in high school and in college. It seems impossible that in three years practically everything can change within a person, yet such is life. But how so, you ask.

WELL, Susan Harter, previous Director of the Developmental Psychology Program at University of Denver, professed in a 1999 article that there are three age divisions within adolescence, and in each age period an adolescent will have a change in self-representation (the way they view themselves in given settings). The adolescent believes he or she has multiple selves and works to make sense of each “self”. In early adolescence (approx. 10-15 Y.O.), pubescents form single abstractions about who they are in certain contexts or relationships, but lack ability to compare them, causing them to inaccurately overgeneralize scenarios. Teens in middle adolescence (approx. 16-20 Y.O.), however, can connect abstractions; in spite of that, when comparing opposite abstractions, they become confused and upset by inconsistent behaviors (a.k.a. the “2-faced person” phenomenon). Late adolescence (approx. 21-25 Y.O.) brings about much resolution as the pre-adult finds balance with both negative and positive attributes, and he or she grows accepting of the necessary flexibility in his or her personality.

Not only are we quick to call out others when they do not stay true to who we believe them to be, but more often we sharply shun ourselves when we get caught lacking. Let me tell you, it’s never that deep. The process of finding oneself is a LAWNGH one, so instead of pitching pennies at newbies, why not gift them with good wishes?

- Brandon Avery

“But You See, the Way My Ego Is Set Up…” (dedicated to Katrina Lynn and Blaine Clay)

“Who am I?” It would seem absolutely ridiculous that the shortest and simplest question ever asked could bring about the most complicated and inconclusive of answers. However, that is exactly what happens with whomever you ask. On the brink of ending “Chapter 24” I look back at the last 11 months, and everything that has taken place truly baffles me. In essence, 23 has been comprised of successfully doing things that I told myself I wouldn't be capable of doing until sometime later, and being patient and diligent enough to work through trials that I thoroughly planned to avoid. In a YouTube web series called Finding Me, the protagonist Faybien claims, "The 20s are all about finding yourself." Hmmm…okay…cool beans, but where are you supposed to start looking, and how do you know when you've found yourself?

One of the top tier psychoanalysts of the 20^th century, Erik Erikson (I STAAAAN for him, YEEEEEESSS!!!!!!) theorized that in human development each being undergoes psychosocial conflicts that arise from the desire to live successfully, sincerely, and shamelessly. Each crisis serves as a turning point for one’s personality development given that the success of later crises/stages depends on the prior one. The eight psychosocial crises are: Trust v. Mistrust (Infancy), Autonomy v. Doubt (Toddler), Initiative v. Guilt (Childhood), Industry v. Inferiority (School-Age Childhood), Identity v. Role Confusion (Adolescence), Intimacy v. Isolation (Early Adulthood), Generativity v. Stagnation (Middle-Aged Adulthood), and Integrity v. Despair (Late Adulthood). For the psychosocial conflict of adolescence, it is most important to the person that he or she knows himself or herself physically, mentally, sexually, socially, emotionally, professionally…in all the ways. On top of that, what the adolescent seeks is the full and consistent embodiment of that self-knowledge. When that is not attained or dissonance (lack of harmony) in personality is frequent, it becomes difficult to achieve—or perceive achievement of—one’s identity. (Now can you see why Erikson is my FAVE?)

While traveling this road to becoming magnanimous, I have discovered SOOO much about myself. I know that though I may not be able profess exactly who I am, I assure you I am well aware of who I am not, which is an excellent start to uncovering your identity. However, it is vital to know what life you are about, rather than focusing on the things that didn't/don’t/won’t work. Take a word from Ms. Frizzle: “Take chances. Make mistakes. Get messy!” #ShowingMyAge

- Brandon Avery

BECAUSE ___________ SAID SO!!!!

“Is my moral compass supposed to demagnetize and re-magnetize every so often?” After the death of the Thornwood High School security officer (where I graduated from 5.5 years ago), I have had many conversations about what started the fight that vicariously yet fatally injured the guard and the proper vs. actual consequences for the students involved. To add, tonight I stumbled upon Rihanna’s new music video for her 9-month-old single “Pour It Up.” Whereas I JAM to that song and LOVE the video, it concerned me that she waited until twerking became such a mainstream subject to make a video for the song—especially for the fact that Rihanna has never released music videos for songs aimed chiefly toward urban radio. It makes me wonder, what makes people think certain actions are the right ones to take, or that certain moments are the appropriate times to do them?

Lawrence Kohlberg, a late but well-respected psychologist and professor, created an entirely new area of developmental psychology called “moral development,” based on his studies that were continuations of the human development theories of Jean Piaget. (We’ll discuss him one day soon, I PROMISE!!). Kohlberg’s theory includes six stages divided into 3 groups: Pre-Conventional (stages 1 & 2; typical of children), Conventional (stages 3 & 4; typical of early/middle adolescents), and Post-Conventional (stages 5 & 6; typical of late adolescents and adults). In Stage 1 morality is driven by obedience and punishment, but a person in Stage 2 is always thinking “what’s in it for me.” Stage 3 of moral development deals with a person being concerned of how their actions conform to their peers’ behaviors while Stage 4 involves having a “law and order” mentality. Stage 5 moralists believe in acting according to social contracts and basic human rights; Stage 6—a level Kohlberg said few humans will achieve or execute consistently—moralists embody “The Golden Rule” and strive to live by universal ethical principles.

Though it is more observed that people at the given ages will demonstrate such moral reasoning due to their cognitive capabilities, people may exhibit any of these stages at different ages. That said, we adolescents do not have to wait until we’re gray-haired to do what is inherently right. Yes, it is MUCH easier to stick to the rules or keep under the radar or do only what is expected of you, but as they say, “If you know better, do better.”

- Brandon Avery